It is probably unfair to House of Prime Rib that it is classified in all of the guidebooks as a steakhouse. The proof that it isn’t a steakhouse is right in the name, “House of Prime Rib.” Because that is what is offered. Thin cut, thick cut, huge cut, but all prime rib. Once you accept that you are going to be eating prime rib, you can sit back, relax and enjoy the show, which includes an unwieldy serving cart with what appears to be a 75 watt bulb stuck to it on the inside.

The prime rib is cooked English style: coated in salt and slow roasted. So in addition to liking prime rib, you’d better like the taste of salt. I do, especially when accompanied by Yorkshire pudding. The other sides (spinach and corn which appear to be out of some three year old’s nightmare) are forgettable, but the salad, which is included with all dinners, is exceptionally tasty and fresh. The bread is so amazing it could impede your ability to eat the rest of your meal.

Martinis were mixed at the table by the waiter. And while the presentation is cute, the drinks were served in their shakers with ice. This way is a terrible thing to do to a decent gin (or even a vodka) martini. And because you can nurse the increasingly watery martini throughout, you may never get to the pricey wine list, a sin in itself.

Service is cheerful and the room is warm, if unbelievably noisy. So in addition to liking prime rib and salt, you’d better like yelling “What?” to your companions.

House of Prime Rib

Alfred’s is red. Very red. Red walls. Red seating. It has the feel of an old-style steakhouse. Unfortunately, the decor was considerably more appetizing than its food.

Alfred’s is priced considerably less than most steakhouses and there’s a reason for it. The steaks are of lesser quality—”primal” cuts of “Choice” Grade”. Don’t let the word “primal” fool you: it’s not the USDA grading; it indicates a large cut of beef that is later cut to the smaller portions for serving. The “Choice Grade” is the USDA grading, and is one step below the highest USDA Prime grade. Usually, you’ll find “Choice Grade” meats in your local super-store, not your fine steakhouses.

Now, if the beef itself isn’t of top-notch quality, it’s going to need some kind of spice rub to add some flavor, at least a sprinkling of salt to pull out the natural juices. Alfred’s proudly declares “There are no rubs, salts or peppers used… we prefer to serve the steak in its natural state” and the meat suffered for it: The ribeye, though tender, had little flavor, and the (huge 30-oz) porterhouse was tough. Jason liberally doused his steak with sauce, something he declares borderline sacrilegious.

Some in our party found the sides, in particular the “garlic” mashed potatoes, were likewise flat tasting (except for one, the pickled pigs feet which, ironically, was too salty). This is one case where “natural state” is not synonymous with “good”. Guys, really: a little salt never hurt.

And while the waiter was friendly and attentive, the entrees arrived while one of our party was still enjoying her appetizer, a major no-no. Fortunately, the scotch and wine lists were impressive, and the bar makes a great martini (shaken at the table, no less).

Despite the disappointing food, Alfred’s was a pleasant evening out, and, if you lower your steak expectations a tad, it’s a good choice (pun definitely intended) if you want the steakhouse feel without the pricetag.

Alfred’s Steakhouse

Ruth’s Chris is a non-chain chain; you probably have at least one in your neighborhood, but it’s considered higher-end. It’s all dark wood and dim lighting. In many ways, it’s a reproduction of what many people think of when they think “steakhouse”. And like most reproductions, it pales in comparison to the real deal.

We were very excited to go to Ruth’s Chris; it was five of us after an improv workshop, and we had worked up an appetite bouncing around a room making bad puns. We’d made reservations for the evening, and we were looking forward to their famed buttered steak.

We arrived and rather than seating us quickly, they made us wait for 20 minutes, despite having that reservation, which is always annoying. We might as well have randomly dropped in for all the good it did us. But, it happens, especially when busy, but some planning on their part would have helped.

When we were finally seated, we quickly ordered a bunch of appetizers, including an order of steak fries. When the fries arrived, they looked great. One problem: the dish contained exactly four french fries. Four french fries for five people. The phrase “clip joint” comes to mind. It’s bad enough to serve an appetizer of four fries, it’s beyond unacceptable to do so to a table of five people.

The evening got worse from there. The buttered steak seemed to use the extra dairy to mask bland meat, and the wine list was uninspired and limited by other steakhouse standards. The tables were too tightly spaced, making for an uncomfortable dining experience.

And to top it off, the bill was excessive, considering the quality of food and service, averaging about $50 per person.

We couldn’t recommend Ruth’s Chris to anyone looking to experience a good steak, or a good steakhouse.

Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse

 

 

 

 

 

 

OK, New Yorkers: stick with with me. It’s “Hugh-stons”, not “House-tons”. I know… that’s just wrong, but they insist they know what they’re talking about.

The steaks and roastbeef are very good and reasonably priced, but the selection is usually limited to ribeye and fillet. The sides vary, though most are good. Having the option of adding a particularly yummy salad is nice for those of us who like that sort of thing. The servers are terrific – one brought me an extra gin and tonic when she heard a busboy had taken away my last sip. View of the bay and fireplace add to the ambiance.

Houston’s